奥运开幕式

由于没及时研究出来怎么在网上看直播，开幕式是看NBC在次日转播的。三个评论员解说的都很靠谱，很可能有备而来，当然，如果是发自内心对中国文化的景仰更好。 在展示活字印刷部分时，大家一度迷失，评论员忍不住抖了个包袱："Wanna know how they did it?" 话音刚落，一张张丰收的笑脸从海片的盒子中欢欣地冲了出来。"They did it with PEOPLE!" 后接三人得意而敬佩的爆笑。 

好些美国人对开幕式的评价都很高，除了一些贫瘠干瘪的赞美"beautiful""amazing""fabulous"外，也有很多有意思的评论，例如： 

我们见证了众志成城的惊人力量和智慧，几千人为着同一个目标相聚于此：吓死你丫挺的！ 

"We witnessed the sheer power and brilliance of what it looks like when thousands of individuals come together for one purpose: to blow your f*cking mind. " 

为神摸俺家的平板电视卷不起来？Circuit City（美国的国美电器）什么时候能有卖的？？ 

"MY FLAT SCREEN TV DOESN'T ROLL UP LIKE FABRIC. Do you think Circuit City will be selling these any time soon?" 

2008个太极人阵和"麦田圈"很像。承认吧，难道不是只有外星人才能把圆搞得那么TMD圆？！ "The 2,008 men doing Tai Chi in unison looked like crop circles. Because let's face it, only aliens could make circles this perfect." 

毫无疑问，这是一场盛大、惊艳、令人发省的演出，我敢肯定伦敦人看完得说"操！" 

"Needless to say, it was a grand, beautiful, and inspiring event that I'm pretty sure made London say "Well, f*ck."" 

如果这场演出的目的在于让一个人为没有身为中国人而感到羞耻，那它丫的目的达到了！ 

"If the desired effect of the ceremony was to make one feel ashamed for not being Chinese, it worked on me! " 

芝加哥正申请2016年夏季奥运会，我看不然咱们也溜吧。就算还有八年，我也不信Daley（芝加哥市市长）和他的老伙计们能搞出人家这规模。退一万步讲，假如我们真能申到，我也想在开幕式上露露脸儿，咱也要敲敲那个长得想匹萨饼的小鼓！

"Chicago's in the running for the 2016 Summer Games and I think we may as well just give up now. Even with 8 years to plan, there's no way Daley and his cronies will be able to pull off something like this. That being said, if we DO get the games, I want in on the Opening Ceremonies. I'll play a drum shaped like a deep-dish pizza! "

我想我是世界上唯一一个没看开幕式的人吧？得亏我没看，要不还怎么混我的美国懒猪日子！"I think I'm the only person in the world who didn't see it. Oh well. But hey, having never seen it, I still feel good about myself being a lazy American!"

随便说个"暴政"，"洗脑宣传"，"死共产党"多容易，还听着有学问。其实，你自个儿都不知道这些词儿到底是什么意思，就算知道也不一定就是你想的那样儿，到头来只能暴露你自己的无知。 "And it's easy to throw around words like "despotism", "propoganda", and "commies" and sound intelligent, but you have no idea what they really mean. They aren't as fitting as you think; it just exposes your ignorance." 

对中国的政治你随便说什么是你的事儿，但是这么牛B的演出完全是出于中国人们秉承的苦练，奉献，团结的的信念，这也是为什么这个B这么牛。

"You can say whatever you want of china's political state but this performance was due to their HARDWORK, DEDICATION, UNITY and the chinese mindset. That's why it rock. "

当然了，没有反对声音也不现实，基本还是集中在人权、污染问题上炒旧饭，毕竟他们也不了解

你问他们用什么能把那个变态阵型（人体鸟巢）保持那么久？用共产主义，谢谢。 

"How did they HOLD THAT FORMATION for that long??? Communism, that's how." 

火炬熊熊燃烧，象征了中国力争完美和致力污染的火一般的激情。 

"The torch burns bright, symbolizing China's firey passion for perfection and pollution."

 演出这么完美是应该的，因为根本没出错的余地。掉一根桨=余生在教育集中营中度过 

"Of course it was going to be perfect. No room for error. Drop an oar = life in reeducation camp. "

整个奥林匹克就像在看一个小孩为了应付爸妈的检查把自己卧室的垃圾都塞到床底下，藏在衣橱里... ... 这下世界清净了，说吧，我们国家多好，说吧，再多买点我们制造的便宜货... ... 

中国一览表： 

持异议者，杀无赦-----已完成 

强制搬迁-----已完成 

喷点儿杀菌剂应付城市恶臭-----已完成 

训练机器人市民来显摆-----已完成 

谎报体操运动员年龄-----已完成 

除掉开幕式表演人员及其被挟持家人-----待完成 

"This whole Olympic experience, is like watching a kid hiding all of their shit under their bed or in a closet, as mommy or daddy inspect their bedroom…….See world it's all nice and clean, so tell me I'm a good country, and buy some more of my mass produced cheap shit….. 

Chinese checklist: Get rid of dissenters……check 

Relocate and destroy Beijing housing……check 

Spray some Lysol to get rid of city stench…….check 

Use robot citizens to display our efficiency……check 

Lie about gymnasts' ages……check 

Kill all family members of opening ceremonies performers being held as collateral……..to do"

全部英文评论部分摘自http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008/08/11/8-opening-ceremonies-moments-that-made-me-crap-my-pants/?rssfeed